The Champions traveled as far south as Nira, hidden in the back of the
box truck. The journey had not been a comfortable one. Inside the truck was
pitch black, and they were jostled back and forth as the vehicle navigated
backroads. The ten of them were shut up in a very small space together for three
days. Each time Harata felt the wick of his patience burning low, he reminded
himself that the journey would’ve taken more than a week on foot- probably
longer due to Blue’s injury. He recalled Yukiiae’s warning, and told himself
that traveling by means of the truck was the best course of action. Yet it had
been a trying time.
Keisuke was incorrigible, terrorizing the girls in the darkness and
continuing to poke fun at Takaeyama. Ayame took any teasing of herself in
stride, but continued to defend the Corduran. Any conversations that took place
within the confines of the truck were easily audible. Harata found himself
cringing at Keisuke and Ayame’s shameless talk of things he felt were better
kept private.
Chieko went through bouts of dejected silence, followed by times of
increased chattiness. When she was in the mood to talk, not a single one of her
fellow Champions was spared. When she wasn’t in the mood, she answered
everyone with short, wistful replies. She’d taken to sighing frequently.
Harata did his best to be patient with her, as he suspected that the reason
behind her mood swings had been left behind up north.
Kazuki took up far too much space, constantly bumping into the others.
Takaeyama had fallen almost entirely silent. Mina was edgy, claiming she hated
small spaces. Blue was himself, peaceful and unchanging. Harata had been shocked
to wake on the morning of the third day to find Kat snuggled in his arms.
As they stood outside the small coastal town of Nira, they’d decided to
skirt the town by means of the coast. They had only to make a two-day journey
west to Kinumi and they’d be at Chieko’s beach house. The twin suns burned
bright and hot this far south, and the morning’s hike left them all sweating
and tired. They took to the hills that edged the shoreline and had lunch in a
small cluster of trees, taking advantage of the shade.
In the evening, they decided to make camp in a forested area in the
hills. Though the suns had not quite set, it was growing shadowy under the
trees. As the group went about the now routine motions of setting up camp,
Harata noticed that some of the party were missing.
“Yukiiae, where’s Blue?”
“He said he wanted to take a look around. Don’t worry, Takaeyama’s
with him.”
Though the idea of the Corduran accompanying Blue brought little comfort
to him, Harata decided not to worry about the Night’s Herald. It wasn’t like
Blue to wander off, but he’d most likely be back soon. I wouldn’t mind
some time to myself after that damn truck, Harata thought to himself.
Blue stood at the bottom of a long flight of stone stairs. They ran up
the side of a heavily forested hill. The steps were overgrown and cracked in
places, giving them an air of neglect. He contemplated the stairs- it wouldn’t
be easy getting up, and possibly harder getting down, but his old sense of
curiosity was tingling inside. He had an inkling of what lay at the top, and was
filled with the idea that he was supposed to go there. Determined, he
began the ascent.
“What… are you… doing?” Takaeyama’s voice came out thick and
slow, each word spoken as a separate entity, as though he fought to speak.
“Going up,” Blue replied simply.
“You… you can’t climb… that.”
“Why not?”
For this, Takaeyama had no reply. All of the perfectly logical arguments
that formed in his mind flew away before he could give voice to them. With a
feeling of resignation, he followed after the Night’s Herald. Blue’s
progress was slow, but finally he reached the top of the stairs. He took a few
steps forward, mystified by what lay ahead.
They stood on the grounds of a temple, one that had long since fallen to
decay. The buildings stood vacant and overgrown with tangled vines. The property
itself was in ruins. Weeds sprouted everywhere, monuments were toppled. Yet Blue
could feel the sanctity of the ground he tread upon. Even in its abandonment,
this place held the grace of the gods. He felt himself fill with both hope and
wonder, frozen momentarily by the gravity of the gift he’d been bestowed.
A new home.
Takaeyama watched Blue as he wandered the grounds, peering in the
doorways of the empty buildings. He waited patiently while the Night’s Herald
prayed in silence. Thoughts tumbled in and out of Takaeyama’s mind, but he
didn’t hold on to any of them.
Blue returned to him, bathed in the red and dying light of the setting
Prime Sun.
He’s beautiful.
The thought rang in Takaeyama’s mind like a gong sounding. He wondered
why he’d never noticed. He wondered what would make him think that now- now
that the Night’s Herald’s former grace was flawed by a lumbering gait and
his skin had taken on a pale cast that hadn’t quite left him since his
illness. Yet there, in that dank and decaying place, surrounded by ruin, touched
by the light of a failing sun, Blue was rendered infinitely stunning.
The Night’s Herald smiled his serene smile.
“If I survive the Task,” he announced, “I’m going to live
here.”
After a pause, Takaeyama spoke.
“Here?”
“Yes.”
“In this… place?”
“In this place.”
Takaeyama forced his mind to stay on target as it threatened to wander.
“I thought you… had… a place… in Mianuus.”
Blue shook his head.
“It’s Makoto’s now. I knew from the moment I entrusted the temple
to him that it would never be returned.”
“You… you lost your home?”
“Yes, but it seems I’ve found a new one.”
You lost your home. Takaeyama’s mind seemed jammed on the
thought. He fought to work his way around it. He couldn’t.
“We should go back,” Blue stated. “Harata will be worried.”
Gently, he took Takaeyama by the arm and turned him around. The Corduran
was obviously struggling, and Blue worried for him. It was an odd feeling-
he’d never felt concern for another person before. In his world, people always
looked after themselves. He was content to let them be as they were while he
concentrated on cultivating his own soul. He’d never had any close
friendships, and now he was faced with the new emotion of fear for others. It
made him feel uncomfortable- perhaps he’d grow attached, unable to accept the
fates of those he was beginning to care for. Was this the ruination of his soul?
It seemed he faced so many tests.
Blue faced yet another test that very night. He was sitting watch in the
silent darkness, the other Champions spread out in sleeping bags all around him.
The air was heavy and still. He felt at peace, any worries of the day swept away
in the path of time.
In a flurry of motion, Yukiiae sat bolt upright and clamped her hand over
her mouth, stifling a whine of fear and pain. When her hand fell, she let out a
gasping sob. Shaking, her arms around her waist, she continued to cry. Again,
her hand flew to her mouth in an effort to silence herself.
“Yukiiae,” Blue whispered, hobbling over to her. He took her free
hand and led her away. “Sit down.”
She sat as requested. Her wracking sobs had quieted, but as she turned
her gaze to Blue, a new wave of tears welled in her eyes. She fell into his arms
and he held her, stroking her hair. She continued crying with all the ferocity
of the brokenhearted, leaving him to wonder at her sorrow. When she’d calmed,
she turned her face to look up at him.
“Did you have a nightmare?”
“Sort of…” she trailed off for a moment. “It’s just… all
this. It makes me remember. I don’t want to remember. I don’t want to
forget, but I don’t want to remember all the pieces that I do.” She wiped
her eyes. “It’s just from what happened… with the HeadHunters. I keep
dreaming about- about… something that happened a few years ago.”
“Do you want to tell me about it?”
Yukiiae gazed up at Blue, internal struggle clear on her face. She took a
deep, shuddering breath.
“Okay.”
He waited in silence for her to begin.
“I moved to the Otherlands after my family all… all died. There was
nothing left for me here, so I decided to go overseas and work as a battlefield
nurse for the Angemal. I thought maybe I could start over, build myself a new
life. It was hard at first, but then… then I met Rain.
“She lived in the same camp. She was… she was so beautiful, so
vibrant. When she smiled it was like… like all the world was rejoicing.”
Yukiiae closed her eyes, her mind sketching out pictures of the girl she
described. “I loved her. I never felt love like that- like my heart would
break or… or just swell up. To know that love for her, and to know her love in
return… I felt like I had a family again. I had a home and it was filled with
peace and joy. We lived together for a few years until… until it happened.”
Yukiiae stopped speaking for a moment, her voice cracking, eyes full of
tears once more. Blue did not prompt her, only held her close and waited.
“There was a battle on the outskirts of Lin’ra’kit. A group of
Angemal soldiers came into our camp, carrying their fallen commander. He was
dying… there was nothing, nothing anyone could do. He was given over to Rain,
that she might ease his passage from life.
“But the soldiers wouldn’t have it. They told her… they told her
his death was not an option. She tried. Oh, by the gods how I know she
tried. It couldn’t be helped. He couldn’t be saved… and- and when he
passed, they- they went into the room, all of them. They locked the door…
“I could hear her screaming. I could hear… other things. I tried to
get in, pounding on the door until my hands bled. I couldn’t… I couldn’t
get in. I could only listen as the soldiers killed her… and… and they…”
Yukiiae shook her head violently, trying to drive the remembered sounds from her
mind.
“It got quiet, then the soldiers opened the door and I fell into the
room. As they left, one of the men told me to remember the penalty for failure.
“She was lying on the floor. There was blood everywhere. They’d…
they’d ripped off all her clothes. They’d cut her everywhere… even… even
where they raped her, they finished with their swords. I held her and I
couldn’t do anything- just watch her eyes go vacant- those eyes, those eyes
that could’ve lit up the whole world. I just held her and she couldn’t
breathe anymore and she was looking up and I was the last thing she’d ever
see.” Yukiiae broke down, sobbing once more.
“Everybody’s gone, Blue. They’re all just gone,” she
choked out. When he didn’t say anything in response, she went on, words
tumbling out, unable to be stopped. “So I thought I’d go, too. Why should I
want to live a life like this? Why should I keep trying? I went off into the
forest, after I came back to Diasminion. I’d go quietly, I thought. That’s
when I was told about the Task. I was told I couldn’t, because I was still
needed. I made a promise to the Elementals. I’d stay and complete the Task. It
was like… like being punished. I wonder what I did in another life to deserve
this.”
“I couldn’t answer you that,” Blue finally spoke in his usual, calm
fashion. “Yet you have risen to the challenges of your life in the now.”
“Have I? Sometimes it feels like I’m just going through the
motions.”
“Sometimes that’s all that’s required.”
They fell silent, sitting in the darkness. After a time, Yukiiae asked,
“Have you ever been in love, Blue?”
“No, I haven’t.”
“I want to ask you about something. You’re the only one who can
answer me.”
“Go ahead.”
“Is there such a thing as soulmates? Are there people who will love
each other lifetime after lifetime until they finally come to rest in Elysium
and love each other then? Will Rain’s soul still love me, even after we’ve
both gone on? In the end, will we be in love in our peace in Elysium?”
Blue had, for as long as he could remember, possessed very strong
feelings about teaching matters of faith. He belonged to a faction of the
Night’s Herald that believed the human soul was a malleable substance. Yet,
while humanity may be impressionable, information must never be forced on
anyone. If a soul is ready for the answer to a particular question, he or she
will ask. Blue felt very strongly about telling only the true answer to any
given query. He’d always believed that if a soul was ready to ask, it was
ready to know.
Now, he wasn’t so sure. He’d learned- especially through Takaeyama-
that sometimes a soul will reach toward whatever peace it can find. People will
sometimes ask not for truth, but for comfort. Blue found that while he would not
lie, he frequently held back things he would otherwise have said. Looking down
at Yukiiae’s tearful face, he could see her desperate longing for peace.
In truth, Blue was aware that a soul will bear marks of its learning
through the ages, but not memory. Elysium was a bliss unlike the living world. A
soul in Holy Death will not be concerned with its former lives, having learned
its lessons and completed its mission. That was not what Yukiiae wanted to
understand. She simply wanted some beacon to guide her through the sorrow of her
life. He looked upon her, this woman who devoted herself wholeheartedly to
easing other people’s pain, and found that he wished to lessen some of her own
burden. He was suddenly pained by her suffering, by the injustice of
Takaeyama’s illness, and by the myriad of ills borne by the rest of the
Champions, feeling an empathy he’d never known before. Blue no longer felt
compelled to speak the harsh, bleak truth, but to utter words that would heal
the agony of other’s hearts. As this feeling grew within him, he wondered at
his own corruption. Yet, looking at Yukiiae, feeling the others slumbering
around him, he realized that perhaps he’d have to forsake Holy Death. He
wanted to live a Holy Life.
As he answered, his words came out in their familiar, serene tones, but
those words were carefully chosen.
“I haven’t heard of such a thing occurring. However, our souls are
who we are, the true beings that are you and me. Bodies are easily
explained, scientific things. They are only temporary homes, borrowed shells for
our souls to use in learning. Souls are mysterious things. I suppose, if you
love another within your soul, that love can become part of your lesson. As you
carry your lessons through all of your lives, you would carry that love as well.
If that is the case, it would be possible to love another soul for as long as
you exist.”
“So you think it could happen?” Yukiiae asked with trepidation.
“As you know yourself, there are many things in the universe that
others cannot see or hear. It doesn’t mean they don’t exist.”
“Thanks, Blue. I… I just feel so empty sometimes. Everything-
even love- seems pointless. I hate that feeling. It’s just that, well, there
just doesn’t seem to be any reason behind anything- only happiness or
pain.”
“Sometimes the reasons are buried very deep. It can take a long time to
see the purpose in our lives. It’ll come to you, if your soul has silence in
which to hear the answers.”
Yukiiae nodded, then snuggled closer to Blue.
“Chieko keeps telling me that you’ve been to Elysium. Can you tell me
about it? What’s it like?”
